Scott Ian Launches 'Food Coma' Column: F--k Olive Garden

Anthrax guitarist and founding member Scott Ian has posted a new report in his new column at SuicideGirls, called "scott Ian's Food Coma". Read an excerpt below:

Traveling the world as I do (wandering Jew) I get to sample all kinds of cuisine. I’m no Anthony Bourdain (love him) or Andrew Zimmern (not so much) but I won’t shy away from the unknown. Local customs and regional cuisine are what I seek out when I’m out in the territories.

I avoid the American or any chain restaurants (with the exception of In-N-Out here in the West) at all costs. Nothing confuses and irks me more than people eating at Johnny Rockets in Japan or the fucking Olive Garden anywhere.

It irks me.

There’s a giant Olive Garden in NYC on 6th Ave right in midtown. NYC has 8,000 good Italian restaurants. Shit, Mario Batali and Joe Bastianich have nine absolutely stunning restaurants (there’s going to be a whole column about these geniuses very soon.) Why wouldn’t you take five minutes and find a place that you’ll remember forever? A great meal can be like great sex. Do you hate great sex?

There are infinity pizza places and even the worst are better than OG. Do I need to keep hammering this point? The horse is dead and the stick is broke. There’s no reason to eat at a chain. I hear stories about American bands touring Europe and only eating McDonald’s. That’s it. Maybe KFC. That is so fucking retarded. I have utter contempt for that. It makes your band suck even more.

I heard a story about Gene Simmons of Kiss (does anyone not know that?) from a few years ago that relates (kinda not really, it’s just a good story and I love Gene) to this. He was out on tour and was out on a night off with a recent Miss America. One of the techs that work for the band saw him go back to his room with her. A few nights later the same tech sees Gene getting in the hotel elevator with what was not Miss America. She wasn’t even Miss Hemet. The next day the tech sees Gene at the gig and asks him why he was with fatty last night when he was with Miss America the other night. Gene’s reply: “You can’t eat filet mignon every night, sometimes you have to eat McDonald’s.”

Maybe with women Gene, but not with food.

Read the entire column at SuicideGirls.com.

Comments

[The Novice]

Umm, right, next time I don't know what to cook for dinner, I'll look him up!

[hamish5178]

wow, the man speaks the truth.

[LamB_OF_goD]

I wish this related to guitars somehow.....

[Rize]

stondagain wrote:

"That makes your band suck even more."

Said the guitar player that has the drummer write all his riffs for him.

Anthrax blows. Especially Scott Ian.

Charlie just contributes some riffs... not all.
And you can't say that Anthrax's first 5 records suck, especially Fistful of Metal.

[UrMomsMom]

luv anthrax and all but UG cmon... these news arent related to guitars at all

[CanCan]

Food column on Suicide Girls?

What the **** has this man became?

[Korzack]

CanCan wrote:

Food column on Suicide Girls?

What the **** has this man became?

Umm I wouldn't be so comdemning about that one, knowing what the suicide girls get up to.
Backj to the topic... Lol nice one Ian - he's always had a decent head on his shoulders (so much so that I'll let him off for been mates with Gene Simmons:p

[666Sabbath666]

Love Anthrax and Scott Ian, and that story about Gene Simmons was hilarious

[GreenSaosiner]

That is the coolest mother fucking picture of that guy i have ever seen

[HeavenlyVirus]

Lovin' the picture

[guitarguy.jerem]

wow two nonmusic related articles about scott ian two days in a row!!

w0ot

[humpacow6]

i hate OG so much..
Scott Ian owns

[silent caution]

why should we care what he eats or dont eat...if anything he should start eating fast food he looks like he is about 100 pounds now

[roarinflames]

wtf is OG?
someone enlighten me
cause ive never heard that here on the west coast

[Kayfan]

CanCan wrote:

Food column on Suicide Girls?

What the **** has this man became?

He just goes there to write the articles... For the free porn

[Jmoney07]

roarinflames wrote:

wtf is OG?
someone enlighten me
cause ive never heard that here on the west coast

OLIVE GARDEN

[Harry Krishner]

I Can't listen to that shmuck.....he loves Gene Simmons.

[ebbbaaa]

Isn't Suicide Girls a porn site?

UG is linking to porn!

>.

[Schizopathic]

ebbbaaa wrote:

Isn't Suicide Girls a porn site?

UG is linking to porn!

>.

SG is not porn you douche...it's f*kin' art...and yeah Olive Garden is terrible.

[PopNFresh07]

Too bad not everyone is a musician making twice as much money yearly as they should be making and can't afford to eat out at "a great Italian restaurant".

P.S. Looks like a retard in the picture. HAY GUYZ I CAN HAS SMIEL ND FINGURE.

[AngerIsAGift06]

you go ian ooooh yeah

[Nacho2006]

Too bad not everyone is a musician making twice as much money yearly as they should be making and can't afford to eat out at "a great Italian restaurant".

i dont think he was sayin you should always eat at the fancy 100 dollar meal places, but that if your touring in a new country or visiting a place that has a plethora of places to eat, why not try them, why eat at some weak ass chain. ps...scott ian is now even more kick ass cuz he like in n out

[Dirtydeeds468]

Scott Ian is Jewish?

[senorpepe]

Whats with everyone bashing him for the drummer writing his riffs?

Sh^t i write bass, guitar, drum, and lyrics for my band. And I 'm pritty sure you guys do too.

[icaneatcatfood]

Scott Ian is and always will be the man. He makes some good points in here (even if is just food).

[Psycho Pigeon]

lol he said jew

[dale-banez]

LamB_OF_goD wrote:

I wish this related to guitars somehow.....

me too

[aliceinnirvana]

I love Olive Garden, but that's probably because it's pretty much the only Italian place around here that's any good, besides Pasta Pasta. And that place is just too expensive. But Scott Ian has an excellent point.

[anodetodrivebys]

im no fancy writer, but at least i know that if you're going to bash on something you should probably say why you're bashing; rather then just say 'dont eat chain foods'... tell us why.

[efferus]

Hahaha. I completely agree with what he has to say. Also, Gene = Gross.

[emr_steelmech]

Everything about that article was hilarious. Scott Ian ftw. Gene Simmons ftl.

[sancho198428]

In-n-Out RULES \m/

[raymanbaracuda]

The Olive Garden is great. You people who say you hate it are too poor to afford $6.99 for salad and breadsticks.

[humanchipmunk]

That is freaking hilarious! I live in Hemet and he's certainly got a point about the girls here. There are a few exceptions, but Hemet is famous for its retired, old people. However I guess we are an odd enough city that even Scott Ian knows about us.

[nik_I]

i agree with him completely. the olive garden is absolutely not italian. it's american-ized italian. there are lots of great italian restaurants in the world that are much more authentic than the olive garden, for similar prices. and there's no basis for anyone to say that the olive garden is authentic. it's kind of like an all you can eat chinese buffet. is that authentic? hell no. how can you tell? do you ever see a chinese person eating there?

[TC1223]

i love it - I'll have to read his column more often.

[TC1223]

that picture is great too

[Uranutan]

Schizopathic wrote:

ebbbaaa wrote:

Isn't Suicide Girls a porn site?

UG is linking to porn!

>.

SG is not porn you douche...it's f*kin' art...

lawl
Are you serious or just sarcastically mimicking what they say?

[sowhat360]

Schizopathic wrote:

ebbbaaa wrote:

Isn't Suicide Girls a porn site?

UG is linking to porn!

>.

SG is not porn you douche...it's f*kin' art...and yeah Olive Garden is terrible.

suicide girls actually opened for the new GNR when I went and saw em...they're basically strippers

[roxtar_shock]

We don't all make enough money to be able to eat at Mario Batali's Restaurant. I would love to eat at new and exciting places all the time but I can't afford it, I don't think that has anything to do with how good my band is... douche.

[VoodooChild15]

I agree to a point. I eat at chains all the time around here, but I'd never even consider it while traveling. I figure I've got all the time in the world when I'm home to check out different restaurants, so if I'm out and about and I want something quick I have no problem with fast food. But if I'm someplace I don't get to go to often, chains wouldn't even cross my mind. I went to Quebec City with some friends a couple years ago and one of our crew refused to eat anywhere but Burger King. The rest of us never ate with him.

Checked.

Oh, and Olive Garden does pretty much suck. While you may not be able to afford Mario Batali's restaurant, you should always support your local mom & pop restaurants.

[GREENWARRI0R]

I've always hated Olive Garden. Italian families (such as mine) can cook food 10 bajillion times better than what they or any other "italian" chain can serve up. Why would you go to a restaurant for just salad and breadsticks? Oh wait I forgot this was a guitar site OOPS. Anyway, Anthrax is awesome. It was killer when Scott came out to play with Public Enemy at Rock The Bells =D

[SethMegadefan]

[sarcastic applause] Thank you a bundle, o great Scott Ian, for enlightening me that McDonalds and Burger King are lower caliber restaurants than fine, expensive Italian joints. I like fast food. I DIDN'T like being insulted for that, either.
You're certainly entitled to your rants, but this one was terribly out-of-place and slightly offensive. Why did UG bother to put this up on their site?
I personally don't like Olive Garden either. But a lot (a LOT) of people do. Is the concept of individuality, of personal preference, completely foreign to you?

[POWERMETAL!]

**** you scott ian, i like the mc d's _-|--

and eating there doesn't negate weather or not your band sucks!

[Soul Power]

*Slowly hides Olive Garden employee application forms*

[kirkadolph]

Thanks for the news, UG!

...

[sestemofatowel]

Um. . . ok

[Guitarman2533]

This was entertaining...i agree **** mcdonalds and olive garden.

[jpgilbert701]

olive garden blows as much as anthrax.

[that1l)ude]

not everyone can afford to eat an expensive meal every night.

[deadlyMETAL]

Nice story with Gene Simmons. But, did he ever actually say WHY OG is so bad? Never been there myself, but I eat where I want....

[Swimrunner]

that is an amazing picture

[H(i)SS]

if he didn't swear so much i'd actually take him seriously.

[Fuzzbox91]

i dont care what anyone says i thought this was hilarious. u make a good point that1dude. Not all musicians are as rich as scott.

[F-ing Hostile]

LOL!! That's awesome, 1. Scott Ian is cool as hell 2. I ate at Olive Garden for the first time in my life last week, and it completely sucked

[Shredder Guitar]

LamB_OF_goD wrote:

I wish this related to guitars somehow.....

It does. He's a guitarist.

Shredder Guitar wrote:

LamB_OF_goD wrote:

I wish this related to guitars somehow.....
It does. He's a guitarist.

And Epiphone just recently decided to make an Olive Garden guitar. Its strings are made of pasta.

[droog4life]

yeah... i really wish my band could afford more than 3 double cheeseburgers and a small soda at mcdonalds (typical tour meal for four of us) when we go on tour....

[Wakisazhi]

^Awesomesauce lol

Anyways I know I at least liked the column, it was a much welcomed laugh (and that pic of Scott Ian just made it even funnier).

[lounge act]

And the Olive Garden-hating bandwagon fills...

But I like him he seems like a pretty cool guy. This doesn't relate too much to music, but it was a good story I think.

[Jeno Webb]

I loved how he gave specific reasons why x resturant is better than OG >_>

[BennyStruggle]

Yeah what is this, lets bag the restaurants like Olive Garden that offer affordable meals that are still nice..."Im a rich rock star I eat at Italian places where its 500 dollars a head you maggots!"

**** off with your opinion somewhere else Scott Ian..you damn bourgeois.

[pucci6d6]

jpgilbert701 wrote:

olive garden blows as much as anthrax.

olive garden must be f*cking great then, cause anthrax is f*cking amazing

[MTVget0FFtheAIR]

BennyStruggle wrote:
.you damn bourgeois.

umm...are you just throwing in words to sound smart?
bourgeoisie = middle class, gg.


olive garden is shit.

[dougydtxranger]

IN-N-OUT FTW!!!!!

if you haven't eaten there then you haven't lived.

[Bored to Tears]

Schizopathic wrote:

ebbbaaa wrote:

Isn't Suicide Girls a porn site?

UG is linking to porn!

>.

SG is not porn you douche...it's f*kin' art...and yeah Olive Garden is terrible.

It's not porn, it's art? Uh, right... I'd like to see you explain that to your mother.

[Dirtydeeds468]

Bored to Tears wrote:

Schizopathic wrote:

ebbbaaa wrote:

Isn't Suicide Girls a porn site?

UG is linking to porn!

>.

SG is not porn you douche...it's f*kin' art...and yeah Olive Garden is terrible.

It's not porn, it's art? Uh, right... I'd like to see you explain that to your mother.

Careful, this can be applied to lyrics in music, as well.

[BennyStruggle]

MTVget0FFtheAIR wrote:

BennyStruggle wrote:
.you damn bourgeois.


umm...are you just throwing in words to sound smart?
bourgeoisie = middle class, gg.


olive garden is shit.

Bourgeoisie (RP [], GA []) is a classification used in analysing human societies to describe a class of people who are in the upper or merchant class, whose status or power comes from employment, education, and wealth as opposed to aristocratic origin. ...

[BennyStruggle]

don't waste my time again MTVgetOFFtheAIR, you aren't smart enough to be misquoting me.

[adslam3]

olive garden rocks...
...scott ian, you think you're better than free/unlimited bread sticks and salad? no way, man. make your own damn food...and make it unlimited, please

[Hellvitica]

I heard a story about Gene Simmons of Kiss (does anyone not know that?) from a few years ago that relates (kinda not really, it’s just a good story and I love Gene) to this. He was out on tour and was out on a night off with a recent Miss America. One of the techs that work for the band saw him go back to his room with her. A few nights later the same tech sees Gene getting in the hotel elevator with what was not Miss America. She wasn’t even Miss Hemet. The next day the tech sees Gene at the gig and asks him why he was with fatty last night when he was with Miss America the other night. Gene’s reply: “You can’t eat filet mignon every night, sometimes you have to eat McDonald’s.”

Maybe with women Gene, but not with food.

lol. Wat a funny story. and wtf's olive garden? i live in australia

[GREENWARRI0R]

" Anthrax guitarist and founding member Scott Ian..." Proof this article has to do with guitars/music.

[IainDavies_2]

To anyone who disses Scott Ian, don't. Did you know he down picks a lot of his riffs. He's up there with James Hetfield in terms of technicality. Anthrax is not yet one of my favourite bands, but i'm getting into them and they very soon will be. His riffs are great and who cares if he gets help from the Drummer, it only shows that he's not a prick about music and he's willing to collaborate, unlike other guitarirsts i've heard of. So think before you diss Scott. Plus his riffs are awsome.

[Robbertto]

"I hear stories about American bands touring Europe and only eating McDonald’s. That’s it. Maybe KFC. That is so ****ing retarded. I have utter contempt for that. It makes your band suck even more."

so we have to eat at certain places to be a good band now? wtf? not everyone can eat at whatever restaurant they'd like every night. and i like scott ian but why post this here? lol

[screamsoftly]

BennyStruggle wrote:

don't waste my time again MTVgetOFFtheAIR, you aren't smart enough to be misquoting me.

What the hell are you talking about, you obviously copied and pasted that definition.

I like Scott Ian a lot more now, I don't agree with hin. But he seems like a cool guy.

[MTVget0FFtheAIR]

BennyStruggle wrote:

Bourgeoisie (RP [], GA []) is a classification used in analysing human societies to describe a class of people who are in the upper or merchant class, whose status or power comes from employment, education, and wealth as opposed to aristocratic origin. ...

source?

bourgeois
1 : of, relating to, or characteristic of the townsman or of the social middle class
2 : marked by a concern for material interests and respectability and a tendency toward mediocrity

[IronMaidenKills]

couldnt agree more.
****in hate american food

[ibanez666]

love food and anthrax. what a****ing excellent article. good stuff UG.